Author: valeriecameronmerritt

Could you make one interaction today or tomorrow more personal?  This can be someone you don’t know very well, but it can also be someone you live with and know “inside and out”.  We have a list of responses we tend to pull from with general interactions and we also tend to apply this in deeply practiced routines with our close family and friends.  Is it possible that you are using the same responses for a number of situations?  Is it also possible that you could tailor what you say for the person in front of you in a particular moment?

If you’d like to make an interaction more personal, you’ll first need to bring your attention to the present moment and a good starting place for that is your breath.  Match yourself to the rhythm of your breath,  slow the breath down and let that stem into slowing your mind and steadying your attention on the person of your choice.  Notice the way your breath feels in your body and how it feels to be living.  There is energy inhabiting you and it’s up to you how you will spend that energy.  Try sending that energy out to embrace someone.  That would mean that both you and whoever you decide to share your energy with could feel nurtured in this visualization by your attention to being fully present and making yourself available to a conversation with your entire being – your eyes, your ears, and the energy of your whole body available to connect.  No one but you needs to know about the imagery if you choose to try it.  The person across from or next to you will know, however, that you are absolutely present with them and that you aren’t just handing out hollow responses and advice that you may also share with a hoard of people.

Think about what would happen if everyone took time to whole heartedly connect with another person and the flood of good feelings that would bring about.  You can lift one person at a time and that can do a world of good!

 

Your voice is a gift.

You have valuable insights and whatever you have to say has worth.  Words that resonate with you will resonate outside of you.  Trust yourself to speak clearly.

What would happen if you let your heart choose something this weekend instead of going through processes of the mind and logic-ing yourself into an action?  We are taught to be practical and there is certainly value in it, but in order to find a balance between the two you’ll have to spend some time on the opposite end of the spectrum to truly know your heart and the only way to do that – is practice!

It may be fun and you may find that your mind functions best when following heart guidance.  What appears to be conflict could become cohesion.

– artist of this card is Tegan Swyny and it comes from the Connected and Free collection of cards for introspection created by Lauren Aletta.

 

During a time when I was living a different life,  more focused on socialization and entertaining, I was also really stuck in the care of what people thought and how they responded to me.  I had spent so much time in that groove of worry that it was almost unavoidable.  I wish for you to never get caught in there.

My family lived on a street with lots of sidewalks and wooded trails. There was a neighbor who maintained a regular bike schedule, and I would see him pass often on my morning walks.  Typically friendly, I would call over a good morning wish to him and wave.  He would look at me and look back to his path without responding. No response.

Initially, I thought, “well okay, we’ll see about that.” not too bothered.  I continued to send my hello and it continued to hang in the air unmet.  The effort grew in gusto because I was for some reason determined to exchange this pleasantry.  So silly but true.  Why doesn’t he answer? I don’t remember how long this went on but I think at least a couple of months.  In that time frame, my family structure changed , and I stopped taking my walks at the same time; everything became varied; I withdrew. When I did return for a lengthy morning walk, the man was still in his same spot at the same time, but when he approached I stayed quiet.  I didn’t care if he said hello…   and do you know that first week back out for the morning walk is when he did speak.

Hello!! Have a good day!

What???! Now that I don’t care, you speak!?? It’s a little example of what happens when we don’t worry or try so hard, when we become part of the unfolding and let go.  I don’t want to recommend that you care less about others but that you care less about what they think and how they respond.  Let that go.

Today is the day!  If you made a list on Monday, take a look over what you wanted to see by today.  What’s different?  What improved?  Do you notice a change? How is next week going to look or feel different than this past one?

Regardless of having made the list or not, going into the weekend, focus on one thing that went well (or that you feel drawn to) and let that guide you, lifting you up and bringing out that inner glow.  That glow deserves you!!

What can you do this week to be more accepting of the whole of you?  What actions can you take to let yourself be fully lived?  Take a look at where you are today and think about what you’d like to see in the next five days.  Make a list of 3-5 things that you can do to let the best parts of yourself shine.  Everyday this week check in with your list to see what’s working and what’s not.  You can decide as you go what stays, what falls away, and if something is calling out to be included.

It’s good to be expressive and use all of your face muscles!  We hold so much tension in our faces and we tend to make similar stressed out faces all of the time – scrunching our eyebrows together with a furrowed brow.  Think about ways to open up the face, release tension, and make expressions that could lift instead of close.

1. Start with opening your mouth wide and sticking out your tongue.  Hold this for 10 seconds.  Open your eyes wide too for extra stretching all or once or scrunch them in if you want.  The focus here is on the mouth and tongue stretch.  You may want to add a lions breath at the start, exhaling with a big, throaty AHHHHHHHHH.  (Give it a try! The only way to do this incorrectly is to not do it!)        

          Be My Friend Gesture & My Tongue Is Longer Than Yours Gesture

2. Puff both of your cheeks up with air and then move the air from one side to the other. Move your eyes around too from side to side, and up and down.  Hold for 10 seconds.

Swish Swoosh Gesture, Balloon Stretch Gesture, & Dentist Pride Gesture

3.  If you didn’t add the eyes wide open stretch to the first pose you could add that on its own to wrap things up.  Go for more or less in the lift of your brow depending on what feels best.  Hold for 10 seconds.

                Say It Again Gesture & You Must Be Brave Gesture 

Thank you, Jessica, for the fun gesture names!

Be in this world but not of it.

How can you be in the world and not of it?

To be in the world and not of it requires something attentive in you.  It’s not intended to set you apart but to connect you more fully and to keep you from getting covered in too much of the muck you may see or hear.  You can’t play by the standard rules and stay the same.  You can’t keep score and hold out on “I love you” or sharing from your resources. You don’t wait to contact your friend because you texted or called last and it’s their turn. What does that matter?  You don’t set conditions on who, how, where, and when.  You surrender to why.

Why do you want the things you want? If you can answer the why and behave in a way that matches your why, everything else will line up. What are your wants and why do you want them?  Let’s break that down.  Do you want more love?  Can you remove the expectation of someone else creating that feeling in and for you?  Can you be and offer love without a condition? Would you like to have more fun? Can you find the fun in what you’re doing today?  Is it more laughing?  Go ahead and laugh.  You can.  Give yourself permission.  Is it more understanding? Be understanding.  How about more forgiveness? Forgive.  Create what you want to experience in yourself first.

It can be so tempting to respond to whatever is happening before you in any given moment.  Making the effort to become what you want to see again and again no matter what someone else is doing, is what it means to be in the world but not of it. With time the effort will be reflected back to you.  As within so without.

 

 

 

A delightful recipe to share with loved ones.  It’s delicious and worth the overnight wait!

 

Hibiscus Ginger Tea

1 cup fresh hibiscus petals

6 cups water

2tbsp lime juice

1/4 cup maple syrup 

2 tbsp minced ginger

1/2 tsp Cinnamon

Ice

 

 

Combine petals, water, and lime 

Bring to a boil

Cover the vessel

Let steep for 22 minutes

Drain the tea into a sealable container 

Add maple syrup and ice

Lid it completely and shake it up 

Refrigerate overnight

“If everyone loves you, you’re probably playing it waaay too safe.  If you’re real, at least a few people might be annoyed.  A little criticism can sometimes be a very good sign.”  –  Tosha Silver 

Sometimes we have to speak up or we may choose to hold silence to honor what feels right in discerning response to situations.  If your truth steps on somebody’s toes, maybe that’s okay once in a while.  People can grow through and because of tension, which isn’t to say you should create it unnecessarily but you also don’t have to avoid those tight spots.  You may find that facing an uncomfortable situation clears the air to relate on more agreeable terms or you may find that a silent composition is the best answer.  Being quiet isn’t necessarily an avoidance as it may convey a peaceable intention.  However, silence can be misinterpreted as it leaves room to wonder.  Do what is real for you.  Speak when you need to and hold silence when that’s your honest and real response.

Thank you to  Rachael King for the incredible photo!