True Friends

A good way to determine who you want to spend time with and which relationships are healthy for you is in looking at how you feel with the person or people.  Do you feel uplifted, understood, and valued?  Do you feel seen?  Do you feel free to express yourself as you are?  Does the connection bring out the best in you?  Take a moment with that one.  Who are you in the relationship?  What emerges between you and the other person or group?  You can like someone and what they represent but not feel great about the convergence of personalities.  Someone who is a friend to you will feel good to be around.  That doesn’t mean they’re always going to say and do what you want because a true friend will instead choose what you need.  That can be uncomfortable, but again who are you in the relationship?  Will you be better for the advice or action?  Are you respected?

Choose wisely because your connections determine so much about your experience.

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Signs

Signs come to us in all sorts of ways.  Be open to receiving them to notice what is communicated to you, and if you don’t believe in that, then you can believe in noticing your response to what’s showing up around you.  Surely your own response has value in being seen and understood. If you ask for a sign this weekend and open yourself to receive, I bet you’ll be pleasantly surprised! Try it.

Affirmation:  I am open to receive guidance and I ask for a sign.  My senses are sharp.  I have clarity on all communication.

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Make it Personal

Could you make one interaction today or tomorrow more personal?  This can be someone you don’t know very well, but it can also be someone you live with and know “inside and out”.  We have a list of responses we tend to pull from with general interactions and we also tend to apply this in deeply practiced routines with our close family and friends.  Is it possible that you are using the same responses for a number of situations?  Is it also possible that you could tailor what you say for the person in front of you in a particular moment?

If you’d like to make an interaction more personal, you’ll first need to bring your attention to the present moment and a good starting place for that is your breath.  Match yourself to the rhythm of your breath,  slow the breath down and let that stem into slowing your mind and steadying your attention on the person of your choice.  Notice the way your breath feels in your body and how it feels to be living.  There is energy inhabiting you and it’s up to you how you will spend that energy.  Try sending that energy out to embrace someone.  That would mean that both you and whoever you decide to share your energy with could feel nurtured in this visualization by your attention to being fully present and making yourself available to a conversation with your entire being – your eyes, your ears, and the energy of your whole body available to connect.  No one but you needs to know about the imagery if you choose to try it.  The person across from or next to you will know, however, that you are absolutely present with them and that you aren’t just handing out hollow responses and advice that you may also share with a hoard of people.

Think about what would happen if everyone took time to whole heartedly connect with another person and the flood of good feelings that would bring about.  You can lift one person at a time and that can do a world of good!

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Practice

What would happen if you let your heart choose something this weekend instead of going through processes of the mind and logic-ing yourself into an action?  We are taught to be practical and there is certainly value in it, but in order to find a balance between the two you’ll have to spend some time on the opposite end of the spectrum to truly know your heart and the only way to do that – is practice!

It may be fun and you may find that your mind functions best when following heart guidance.  What appears to be conflict could become cohesion.

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– artist of this card is Tegan Swyny and it comes from the Connected and Free collection of cards for introspection created by Lauren Aletta.

A Very Small Example

 

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During a time when I was living a different life,  more focused on socialization and entertaining, I was also really stuck in the care of what people thought and how they responded to me.  I had spent so much time in that groove of worry that it was almost unavoidable.  I wish for you to never get caught in there.

My family lived on a street with lots of sidewalks and wooded trails. There was a neighbor who maintained a regular bike schedule, and I would see him pass often on my morning walks.  Typically friendly, I would call over a good morning wish to him and wave.  He would look at me and look back to his path without responding. No response.

Initially, I thought, “well okay, we’ll see about that.” not too bothered.  I continued to send my hello and it continued to hang in the air unmet.  The effort grew in gusto because I was for some reason determined to exchange this pleasantry.  So silly but true.  Why doesn’t he answer? I don’t remember how long this went on but I think at least a couple of months.  In that time frame, my family structure changed , and I stopped taking my walks at the same time; everything became varied; I withdrew. When I did return for a lengthy morning walk, the man was still in his same spot at the same time, but when he approached I stayed quiet.  I didn’t care if he said hello…   and do you know that first week back out for the morning walk is when he did speak.

Hello!! Have a good day!

What???! Now that I don’t care, you speak!?? It’s a little example of what happens when we don’t worry or try so hard, when we become part of the unfolding and let go.  I don’t want to recommend that you care less about others but that you care less about what they think and how they respond.  Let that go.

One thing

Today is the day!  If you made a list on Monday, take a look over what you wanted to see by today.  What’s different?  What improved?  Do you notice a change? How is next week going to look or feel different than this past one?

Regardless of having made the list or not, going into the weekend, focus on one thing that went well (or that you feel drawn to) and let that guide you, lifting you up and bringing out that inner glow.  That glow deserves you!!

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Reset

What can you do this week to be more accepting of the whole of you?  What actions can you take to let yourself be fully lived?  Take a look at where you are today and think about what you’d like to see in the next five days.  Make a list of 3-5 things that you can do to let the best parts of yourself shine.  Everyday this week check in with your list to see what’s working and what’s not.  You can decide as you go what stays, what falls away, and if something is calling out to be included.

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Face Yoga

It’s good to be expressive and use all of your face muscles!  We hold so much tension in our faces and we tend to make similar stressed out faces all of the time – scrunching our eyebrows together with a furrowed brow.  Think about ways to open up the face, release tension, and make expressions that could lift instead of close.

1. Start with opening your mouth wide and sticking out your tongue.  Hold this for 10 seconds.  Open your eyes wide too for extra stretching all or once or scrunch them in if you want.  The focus here is on the mouth and tongue stretch.  You may want to add a lions breath at the start, exhaling with a big, throaty AHHHHHHHHH.  (Give it a try! The only way to do this incorrectly is to not do it!)        

          Be My Friend Gesture & My Tongue Is Longer Than Yours Gesture

2. Puff both of your cheeks up with air and then move the air from one side to the other. Move your eyes around too from side to side, and up and down.  Hold for 10 seconds.

Swish Swoosh Gesture, Balloon Stretch Gesture, & Dentist Pride Gesture

3.  If you didn’t add the eyes wide open stretch to the first pose you could add that on its own to wrap things up.  Go for more or less in the lift of your brow depending on what feels best.  Hold for 10 seconds.

                Say It Again Gesture & You Must Be Brave Gesture 

Thank you, Jessica, for the fun gesture names!